I am so sorry I haven’t written much this summer. Thank you for being patient with me while things have been quiet at The Felicity Bee. I have been in the middle of some major life decisions and have needed to get into a quiet place to hear God and search out His will.
When the Lord releases me, I will be sharing about one of these decisions. But the other actually came very easy for me . . .
“I want to cherish you. I want to treasure you. I want to provide and protect you. I want to learn to love you like Jesus loves you. Erika, will you marry me?”
And with tears in my eyes, and a racing heart . . . I made the wonderful decision to say yes to marrying my Steven.
I have walked a heart-breaking road over the past three years, and he was there to piece my heart back together. I have been hurt, abused, and rejected, and he was there to show me the healing love of Jesus. I lost my smile for a little while, and he was there to help me find it again.
Through his love, Steven has showed me the redeeming power of Jesus Christ to give us beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, and the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness. (Isaiah 61:1-3)
On September first, I walk into a new life, I begin writing a new chapter, and I become “Mrs. B”.
We aren’t doing a big wedding, just a small ceremony with our immediate family. I don’t need a big wedding at this stage of my life. My heart right now, is to build a marriage. Most brides focus so much on the day and so little on the marriage. I don’t want to make that mistake again. I am putting all of my efforts into our marriage, and not necessarily into the day.
I am trying to learn as much as I can about what makes a great marriage. I have received some wonderful advice from friends, readers, and family on what it takes to have a lasting, loving, and God-like marriage.
I tried to write out a top ten list of great-marriage advice, but it’s been done. I tried to write out the Biblical pattern for marriage, but there are volumes of books related to that subject. I wouldn’t be adding anything new.
And then the Lord spoke to my heart and said, “Be transparent.” Of course, the Lord would ask me to do something that is very difficult for me, but in asking me to be transparent to you, He is also asking me to let down any lingering walls of the past that would separate me from my future husband.
So instead of a lengthy “how to” or “top ten” post, here is my heart for my future husband . . .
My Dearest Steven,
When I was a little girl, I would dream about my future husband. He was very tall, he had blond hair, and he had blue eyes. That is all I saw when I imagined the man who would sweep me off my feet.
And then you came into my life.
Six foot five, blond hair, and blue eyes. You were an answer to the prayers of a little girl dreaming of her Prince Charming and having a super silly crush on Bo Duke from “The Duke’s of Hazard”!
And now, my real-life “Bo Duke” has asked me to be his wife.
How did I get so blessed?
I have messed up so much, Steven, and yet God, in His amazing grace sent you to me.
You are a man of great character.
You are strong.
You are a protector . . . you shield me.
You are a provider . . . you take care of me.
You are patient, you are kind, and you do not boast in yourself.
You are do not hold my past against me.
You love me with the love of Jesus.
You look past my faults, and you see my needs.
You are a picture of Jesus.
You are funny. You are smart. You are wise.
You are light-hearted when you need to be and serious when you need to be.
You love my son like he is your own.
You, Steven, are a good man. You are a godly man.
You are my Boaz.
I’ve done marriage before . . . and I got it all wrong. Baby, I am sorry for that. But I promise you, that this time it will be all the Lord designed it to be, because this time . . . it is all Him.
I promise to be a good wife to you.
I promise to give you my best, and not my leftovers.
I promise to put you and Asher first before anyone or anything.
I promise to never go to bed angry.
I promise to listen to you when you speak and hear what you have to say.
I promise to share my heart and not put up walls.
I promise to say I LOVE YOU every night before we drift off to sleep and every morning when we wake up.
I promise to make you laugh.
I promise to yell at you with my New York accent every once in a while. 😉
I promise to keep the past in the past and learn from my mistakes.
I promise to strive to be the Proverbs 31 woman because I believe she is attainable when the Lord is your strength.
I promise to be a lady of class, grace, and elegance even though our culture frowns on ladies of grace.
I promise to let you be a man of strength and honor even though our culture frowns on that as well.
I promise you that Jesus will always come first.
I promise to always sing to you . . . if you promise to dance with me.
Baby, when I look at us in fifty years, we are both sitting on a front porch in our rocking chairs. We are taking about our life’s adventures from the theater, to the blogs, to the ministries, to the worship, to the business’, to the lives touched, and the journeys walked. We are talking about our kids, and our grandkids, and how we are still so very much in love.
Then, you look at me and say, “Can I have this dance?” And my response, “You can, if you let me sing the song we dance to.”
I promise you baby, there will always be music, and there will always be dancing.No matter where the Lord takes us or where new chapters lead us, we will always sing the songs of heaven and dance to the rhythms of His grace.
I found the man who swept me off my feet. I found the melody that caused my heart to dance. And together we began to build . . . a new life.